The Power of Waiting!
Speech-language pathologists love to talk about “pausing” and “wait time.” There is a good reason for this! Believe it or not, this one small change in our behavior can make a world of difference in our little ones’ communication!
What do we mean by waiting?
Waiting means giving a child time to think and respond! A response could be gestures, vocalizations, signs, or words, depending on their development! We often talk about using “wait time” in the form of an expectant pause or by pausing in anticipation. We are referring to pausing for at least a few seconds + using a facial expression 😮/gesture 🤷♀️ that lets the other person (such as your child) know you want them to respond. Pausing alone isn't always enough to encourage communication, so we like to give as many clues as possible without yelling out, "Hey! I want you to communicate now!!"
It’s easy to ask children questions and quickly respond before giving them time to think and answer for themselves. After all, children usually take longer to process information than we do! However, when a child is not responding, it doesn’t necessarily mean they aren’t thinking about what you said or not trying to respond. When we jump in and start talking, it can interrupt the thought process and make it more difficult for them to respond. Children benefit from having wait time to process what we are saying or asking them, rather than jumping in and then moving on from the conversation.
How do you try this at home?
Give your child at least 5 seconds of wait time to think and attempt to respond before interjecting! If you ask your child, “What does a cow say?” wait for them to think and respond! Your child may not be ready to say “moo” yet, but you are providing time for them to attempt to communicate! After you wait 5-10 seconds, if your child does not respond, then you can model the answer!
When are some good times to try “wait time?”
When offering choices! Giving your child choices not only builds independence, but it is also an opportunity for them to communicate with you! Wait time after offering choices is so important because it lets your child think about what you said AND it provides enough time to come up with a response.
Examples:
For mealtime, you can ask if they want blueberries or strawberries and wait for their answer.
During playtime, ask if they want the toy car or puzzle, then wait!
At bedtime, hold up two books and ask your child to touch/point to the one to be read! Wait for their response!
When giving directions! Directions can be challenging for little ones, which is why it’s so important to provide enough time for them to think about what is being asked.
Examples:
Please get your shoes! (wait)
Put the trucks in the bucket! (wait)
First get paper and then markers. (wait)
When modeling a task! We spend so much time showing little ones how to do a variety of things and new skills can take a lot of repetition! It’s also good to give some time for your child to attempt something new on their own. Even if you see they are struggling slightly, use some “wait time!” Not only will it give little ones room to try the task, but it also provides them with a chance to ask for help when needed!
When pausing, use a facial expression to let your child know that you are anticipating a response!
When playing! Integrating longer pauses into playtime gives your little one a chance to problem solve on their own. It is also a great time to work on imitation! For example, you could push a truck and then wait! Does your child try to copy you? Maybe they grab a truck and start playing alongside you. This wait time helps them to come up with their own plan!
When making comments! As easy as it is to fill quiet moments with talking and narrating, it can help your child communicate back when you wait for about 5 seconds after making a statement. You could comment on what you see or something your child is doing and then wait! When you do this, you want to make sure you are showing interest and anticipating a response. "I'm pushing a truck! (Pause)". This encourages your child to communicate back. If they don’t, that’s okay! Move on with the conversation and try again another time.
Other examples:
★ When reading a book that your child knows well, leave a word out and use an expectant pause! "Brown bear, brown bear what do you ________ (pause) see!"
★ While singing your child's favorite song!
"Twinkle, twinkle, little __________ (pause) star."
★ After asking a question, pause in anticipation to let your child know you are waiting for an answer. “Where is the cow? (Pause)?”
★ When using verbal routines! "Ready, set, _________ (pause) GO!"
★ When you want your child to imitate you. "Bababa! (Pause)"
★ When you model a sound/gesture/word. "Bye! (Waving and then pause)"
💕 Try using wait time with your child and let us know how it goes below!
